BROODY.

The last few months I have been, for lack of a better word, BROODY. My little baby is not longer little - he is big, bounding, noisy and long. I've found myself staring longingly at adorable little newborns in adorable little outfits and wishing I had one of my own to snuggle with. Don't get me wrong, Archer can still snuggle (as long as it's occasional, on his terms, and Chuggington is playing) but something inside me is calling out for a second little bundle of joy to keep me up all night.

I must say I am a little surprised. After having Archer I was a broken woman. Labour and the weeks that followed was the hardest thing I have ever done. Getting myself back to normal, learning the ropes of breastfeeding and months on end of co-sleeping with a wakeful baby was not an easy feat. Alas, here I am, ready to do it all again.

Only not just yet.

Now maybe can't isn't the word. Perhaps 'shouldn't' would be a better fit. We all know babies are expensive, but that's just one factor... In September I'll be beginning the third and final year of my business degree. I have already done University whilst pregnant, and I'm certainly not in a rush to have a second crack at it. Doing it again during the most important part of my education would definitely not bode well in terms of my academic achievement.

I also need to think long and hard about where I want to go after I graduate. I have no idea what I want to do post-studies, but having another baby will pretty much guarantee that, at least for a while, I'll just be a Mum - and as a recent graduate, I don't think not working is really a viable option. Not if I want to get my foot well and truly onto a career ladder, anyway.

So, for now, there will be no bump here. Check back this time next year and we'll see where we stand then...

xxx